5 Parent Dream Moments for Instagram Gone Wrong

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I remember when we were trying to get pregnant, my husband and I were incredibly aware of parents walking around with their kids. I remember seeing the mom with her new baby, holding him in the restaurant, while he slept away in her arms. I remember seeing the dad at the lake with his toddler, probably showing him how to fish for the first time. Remember when you were pregnant for the first time and it seemed like everyone was pregnant too?

I knew as a first time parent that things would be hard and not so picturesque as the glimpses we see on the street. In fact, that’s why my husband and I put off having kids for almost eight years. But, we were excited first time parents and I remember sometimes, late in the night we’d both be awake and we’d talk about some of the excited memories we anticipated making when starting our family.

In a world enveloped by social media, you would probably be lying if you didn’t see a photo on Instagram and secretly remember to try that with your little one. Some of your greatest photo ideas come from your fellow Insta addicts.

A year and a half later with ten months of diapers (sheesh, when can we potty train already?) with a ten month old, you learn those memories are like flashes that come and go so fast, you can hardly remember they happened in the midst of sleep deprivation. And what about those moments we anticipated would be our “charming” little family memories?  What actually happens in those dreamed about moments?
1) Parent dreams about taking cute photos of their newly crawling baby, peeking out from under the coffee table and sharing it on Instagram. #cutestbabyever
What Really Happens: Your baby isn’t peeking out because they are way to engrossed in eating whatever unidentified object was growing under your coffee table because who has time to actually clean under there when you’ve got kids running around. Whew.

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2) Parent dreams about baby playing outside, maybe picking a dandelion and looking at it curiously.
Baby waits on parent while just taking in the world. Ah, yes, another Insta moment. Seriously, I had an exact image like this. Man, sweet mother. #justyouwait
What Really Happens: Baby eats the dandelion and another one. And another one, until you realize he’s eating all the dandelions while being so quiet.
Tip: Never mistake quietness with good behavior. Never.
By the time you find him, he has already found a new interest in the surprise your neighbor’s dog left as they walked by earlier.

3) Parent dreams about snuggling with their little one for naps as they gently fall asleep against their chest. Totally Insta worthy. Hello #sleepingbaby.
What Really Happens: Your baby has now discovered your nose and eyes and even your ears. These are incredibly fun to try and rip off your face. Now, this could be Insta worthy. #babyripsfaceoff
But your too tired to even care because all you want to do is sleep. Did I mention the biting? Ever had a teething baby gnaw on your shoulder as you try to sing “Go to sleep little baby”? Yah, no one ever makes it through that song with a teething little.
4) Parent dreams about their little’s first photo with Santa. This will blow up your Insta likes. #babysfirstsanta
What Really Happens: Screaming. Crying. Lots of crying. There will be a glare in this photo from all the tears. I don’t blame the kid for this one, really. A large, strange man, laughing at me for being so little? Really?

5) Parent dreams of hoisting your toddler on your shoulders as they excitedly watch the town parade and all the horses trot by. You decide to make them giggle with a little tickling. Thank you #documentyourday
What Really Happens: Vomit. Too much tickling. Yep, that’s the cotton candy you just had to buy him earlier. A sticky and slimy car ride home, followed by a toddler with an upset stomach from all the candy you let him eat.

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Parent dreams of that feeling they say you get when your little grabs your finger for the first time.

That feeling when they begin to crawl for the first time and you could care less what they eat under the table because you’re ecstatic they figured it out. OK, maybe you’ll do a quick sweep under there.

That feeling when you laugh with them as you hose off the doggie poo they ate while playing outside.

Who cares about the photo with Santa. They won’t remember anyways.

Throw up is never picturesque but the pure joy they experienced by running around with cotton candy in hand, while waiting for the parade to start? That’s what really happens when parents see their dreams unfold as their babies grow. Pure innocence and joy. #enjoytheride

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Come on guys. I know you have some #instamomentsgonewrong. Tell us what they were!

If you want to see more of me fumbling along as a mama to encourage yourself, check us out on Instagram.

Toodles!

Being a Parent Freaks Me Out

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Squishy oatmeal on the floor. Granola stuck to the seat. Bacon filling the air. Dogs licking everything. Breakfast is my favorite. Bubby’s in a good mood and ready to try whatever food I throw his way. I said ready to try. Not always actually eat. We’ve been doing the whole “let-them-feed-themselves” bit and it’s worked out pretty well, for the most part. Drawback to this? Flying food when he’s not interested. Thank God for my dogs. Mike doesn’t even know the half of what’s been on our floor and mopped up by the dogs. I look at Asher and I can see the flail is about to commence. He’s going on 9 1/2 months and I’m telling you that kid already can feel when he does something he’s not supposed to. His hand is raised. I give him the look. He gives me the look. The look that says I’m still too little and don’t understand, right? You’re not going to do anything to me? Right? I’m just gonna throw this bloppy raspberry over… It’s an amazing and very quick process all of which happens in about three seconds. Breakfast is over.

 

“Let’s move to the front room,” I find myself saying out loud. If you don’t know this already, parents start this habit of speaking everything they do out loud when they have children. “Let’s not do that, let’s go out side, let’s clean this toilet, let’s not pick our nose.”

I find myself thinking how in the world I would do this with two kids running around. That’s right. Running. I’ve just got the one who has just started crawling.Being a ParentFreaksMeOut

I remember when everyone was asking if he was crawling yet. While this is my first kid, I knew better than to hope for mobility. Mobility means chaos. Or fun. Whatever. Fun for about ten seconds. He’s crawling for the DVDs as soon I set him on the ground. I’m OK with this. It’s when we see the pretty light on the plugin that I start to get nervous. I always like to watch and see what he’ll do now that he’s discovered this ability to actually GO where he wants. The plugin calls his name. I swear he looks at me to see if I’m going to let him grab it.

It’s in this moment I freak out. I freak out because the realization that I am one of the biggest forces that will shape my son’s morality hits me in the gut.

Being a SAHM has been amazing so far. I know I still have a big journey ahead as Asher gets older and hopefully, someday, our famly grows bigger. There are the good days and the bad days, but I am enjoying this ride so far. When you become a first-time-mom and if you desire to stay home and are lucky to be able to, I don’t think you ever see the big picture of what you’re getting yourself into. Even if your kids are in daycare, you are still fumbling along the wall looking for light to help you navigate and figure out what the heck you’re doing. No matter if you work or work from home, whatever, you are now a parent. You are in charge of this little life. Don’t even get me started when his life grows outside of days with mom and dad.

No matter if you work or work from home, whatever, you are now a parent. You are in charge of this little life.

Being a SAHM logically means you spend A LOT of time with your littles. Knowing that I’m responsible to help him understand the difference between fun and risk or humor and bullying or love and lust is overwhelming. I think I’m starting to see what other parents mean when they say parenting is a privilege. We have a special right to guide and love someone unconditionally. No wonder many parents find God when they have children. What better way to understand His unconditional love for us than to experience a snippet of it with your own child.

Being a parent freaks me out when I think about all this. I’m reminded how small I am, how fragile I am. How fragile Asher is. How strong he is. How strong I can be. Never before has the phrase “God is my strength” rang more true to me than when I hear it tossed around as some kind of cliche. No. Not a cliche for me. A rock solid truth. A reminder that I can’t do this without Him. I am nothing without Him. The more I live this truth out in front of Asher, the more raw and human I am, then the better Asher will be. The better I will be.

Being a parent freaks me out. Being a parent makes me stronger.

 

Snuggly Morning Nursing

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Some of my favorite moments are nursing Asher. I love the sleepy eyes and grabby hands as he voraciously eats in the morning. I’ve gotten into this habit of asking other parents when is their favorite time to feed their little one. Some dads love the bedtime bottle, giving them time alone after a busy day. Some moms like the morning bottle to start their day off in peace before heading to work. Other moms like the afternoon nursing to bring some quiet to their chaotic day.

No matter how or when you feed your little, I have found almost all parents have a bonding experience during that time. I’ve talk before about how feeding a baby can be lonely, especially during those early months, but I’m learning as time goes on, I’m really starting to cherish some of these quiet moments Asher and I have together.

I love my snuggly morning nursing.

What about you? When is or was your favorite time to feed your squish?

Enjoy the Little Things: Bubby’s Almost 8 Months!

 

 

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He laughs pretty much every time I toot.

We’re almost 8 months old. Yikes.

He laughs when he drops things. Repeatedly. On purpose.

Splashing is a good thing in the tub.

Naps are craptastic right now.

I never knew someone could be so impatient when eating peas.

Clinginess comes in spurts. Sometimes it’s like a tidal wave.bubbyshands

I want to just eat up his hands. So sweet.

I wish the top teeth would just come in already.

He’s a pro at grabbing his food these days. Except for those peas.

The boy has never chewed on anything except his hands. Ladies and gentleman, I give you the mystery of the wooden spoon. Chew toy #1 in our house.

Usborne touchy feely books, you are awesome.

Clinginess equals extra snuggles before nap time. Thank you.

 

To read more detailed summaries for Asher, click here.

Having More Than One Kid: How It All Starts…

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morethanonekid(This post also appears on gloryannaboge.com.)

I was rocking Asher one afternoon and I could hear the radio playing softly in the background. We have KLOVE radio playing in our house pretty much 24/7. “Flawless” by Mercy Me was playing. I was overcome with memories and emotion.

You see, this was one of those songs that held a special place for me when Asher was born. There were many 3:00AM nursings when I would hear this song playing in the background and tears would fall because I hoped (and still do) that Asher would know what it means to be “flawless” in Christ. I want him to know and experience God’s love.

I’m sure tears were also falling because I was exhausted, full of hormones,  and overwhelmed with how hard it was and how could I love this sweet little guy so much?!?

It’s like we have this bond of going through those newborn stages together.  I didn’t know what I was doing. Asher didn’t know what was going on. We were surviving together. I look at him now and get a little freaked out when I start thinking about him walking and talking back to me. Eeeek. But for the first time since having Asher, I got it. That ridiculous feeling I’ve heard parents mention.  I don’t think all parents experience this and I don’t think it matters if you do or not, but I felt it. That twinge. The craziest feeling of “hmmm, I think I could survive more late/middle of the nights.” Or “I can handle all the crying and not knowing what’s wrong.” The list could go on.

Of course there is a great difference in the feeling of what it would be like to bring home another baby. As a second-time parent, generally, you do know a lot more of what’s going on. Even if it can be hard, there is a special boost of confidence just really knowing and understanding it, unlike the first time. If you’d asked me two months ago about having another one, I would’ve laughed and said something like “Are you crazy?”.

Then I start thinking about having two kids grown up, running around our home and it does make for a sweet, anxious, crazy feeling. So much unknown. It’s amazing how we do this. Give birth. Parent. Raise a family.

I just read a post about how hard parenting can be, but then how rewarding it is and what a privilege it is to be able to raise your children. In the comments, someone said that having a family was crazy and all she ever heard was the parents complaining about no money, no time,  no privacy. She asked, “Why would I want to do that to myself? I like my time. I like having my money. I like being able to do whatever I want.” I thought about that and you know, there’s nothing wrong with those things being important to her and high on her priority list. But that doesn’t mean parents who struggle with these things are living in some kind of despair.

Happiness is a choice and I choose to have a child, and God-willing, will most likely have another one, BUT there is an inexplicable joy that you can’t produce on your own, on demand, that comes from your child’s sweet little face laughing at you singing “I’m a Little Teapot” for the thousandth time, when you could be out doing “whatever you want.”

So, when I’m singing to Asher while changing his major gross diaper, and he’s laughing, and I hear “Flawless” in the background, I get that feeling. A reassurance that I could definitely do this again. Afterall, who doesn’t like the song “I’m a Little Teapot.”

(This post also appears on gloryannaboge.com.)havinganotherkid

A Salute to the Working Dad

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Mike came home from work late and was exhausted. I could tell he needed a little time to transition being home. Sometimes I take for granted that he just worked a twelve hour day and coming home from the chaos of work takes him a moment. I feel like there is all this hooblah out there about working moms and stay at home moms and some ridiculous battle ground gets created about who’s better blah blah.

I personally couldn’t imagine the pressure and responsibility  that goes with being a working mom. See. That thought right there. It’s so easy to go down that path and totally leave out the working dad. What about his enormous amount of pressure and responsibilities? I thought about that as Mike came home late from work. I realized that it’s important for me to acknowledge that in Mike. Letting him know how proud I am to be his stay at home wife and mom. How fortunate we are to have this opportunity.  I know so many working dads who are passionate about being a dad, passionate about being the sole provider of the home or partnering with their wife to provide together.  Why not encourage them and lift them up for all they do?

We talk a lot about being a working mom. But what about the working dad? Why not take a moment and remember him and all that he does. Read on for more.

A salute to the working Dad.

A salute to all the times you come home to the poopy diaper and change it with genuine joy…for the most part.

When you walk through the door and are bombarded with the emotions of a little one who had a hard day at school and she needs your hug to make it right.

When your wife looks to you to keep peace in the home because the boys wont stop yelling.

When you say goodnight to your youngest and can’t believe he was an “accident” because you can’t imagine life without him.

When you pull up in the drive and take a few deep breaths before you walk in because you know today is the day your little one would have been five years old.

When you walk in and hug your wife remembering together.

When you do the dishes and take the dogs out and play Candyland after a day of meetings.

When you fall back to sleep after waking in the night because daddy’s snuggles is the only thing that would put him back to sleep and you aren’t thinking about how you have to get up in two hours to work a twelve hour shift, no, you’re thinking about going back in there to finish the night snuggling with your little guy.

When you massage your wife’s feet because you know she just put in a twelve hour day with some of the most important people in your life.

When you walk in and sit down for dinner excited to hear what’s going on in their lives.

When you feel like you’re not doing enough and she surprises you with her drawing from school about you being her favorite person.

Working dads are needed as much as the working mom or stay at home mom or the stay at home dad. Remember to encourage your working Dad. Let him know how much he matters. Life wouldn’t work without him.