I remember scrolling through Michelle’s site and thinking, “This gal gets me!”. Her honest writing and cheeky thoughts about fashion and fitness, oh yah and how could I forget, WINE! had me from the start. I decided not to hold it against her that she lives in Canada. 🙂 Michelle is what I would call a no-nonsense writer. She’s direct and tells you what she thinks. I appreciate that in a writer, as I’m sure many of us do. It’s good to find someone you know who is out there over and over, being as honest with you as they can be as a writer. If you’ve haven’t found Michelle yet, hop over to her site and say hello!
With a few-week-old baby curled into me as I sat on the couch, the day brought about a time of reflection on my short experience in motherhood. The previous weeks of taking care of a tiny human had been challenging. The demands of a newborn had changed everything from life as I’d known it…
I’d changed physically, mentally, and emotionally to anticipate the role of mom throughout 9 months of pregnancy, through labour and birth, and I changed even more so in the bumbling, inexperienced, stressful moments of assuming that role.
There were many skeptical moments where I questioned whether it was “all worth it” as I’d been reassured by other well-meaning moms. The weight of motherhood was settling around me like a lead blanket.
“Oh. This is what it feels like to be a mom.”
Heavy. Suffocating. Painful. Emotional.
It was terrifying to have a piece of my heart and soul separated from my own body to vulnerably exist out in the great big world.
But amidst all the complicated difficulties, there were powerfully contradicting feelings of joy, purpose, comfort, and belonging. I was a Mom.
It Was Then That I Understood What It Meant To Be A Mom
I really did, and in a way I couldn’t have possibly comprehended before baby. Becoming a Mom was one of the best (and most challenging) things I’ve done in life. The exhaustion, the changes in my body, the pain and trauma of birth, the explosively poopy diapers, the cries that couldn’t be consoled, endless laundry, and dependency of another life…
As terrifying as it all sounds, there was something wonderful and joyous even in the most difficult aspects. Even in the toughest times, there has always been a small corner of my heart that laughed, smiled, or thanked God for the opportunity to experience life as it was in that moment.
And then there are the stop-your-heart moments of cuteness and life-fulfillment experienced in a way only Moms can relate to… those tender moments that forever imprint themselves into our maternal memories. The smell of newborn hair. Snuffly baby snores. Tiny fingers barely curling around one of yours. A first smile. Melt-me-into-a-puddle moments… moms, you know what I’m saying.
As a new-ish member of the Mom-club, the depth of understanding has now settled in, and reality has formed an indescribable appreciation for my own Mother and all others out there. I get it now. The craziness. The emotions. The fear. The selflessness. The sacrifice. The joy. The love.
To all the Moms out there, YOU ARE AWESOME for all you are and all you do. I hold all of you in higher regard than ever before.
Article originally published on MT Bottles blog
Michelle Thevenot is a work-from-home mom-boss and creative entrepreneur from Osler, SK, Canada. Manager of several small businesses, artist, blogger, and preventer of household destruction by a toddler-dog duo (partners in crime, those two), her hands are full, but so is her heart as she lives her passion.