What’s Up with Fake Follows?

 

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I recently created an Instagram account for my blog. I had a personal one, but felt like I needed to promote my blog separately and since Instagram recently created a way to have multiple accounts on your phone and I have a new email address by having Blue Host for my WordPress site, long sentence short, I joined the blogging world of Instagram.  I use Twitter and honestly, that started out as a personal account, which I never used, so I switched up to be my an outlet for my blogging. I noticed an interesting trend that began as I beefed up my use of #hashtags. One day I would have some new followers, so what was 100 followers now is 105 followers. The next day, my followers number would be 99. What? That’s when I discovered fake follows.

I guess I’m somewhat oblivious to some of the “follow” rules out there. I came across a post from a blogger I particularly like, and Courtney mentions that bloggers should cut out all that “follow for follow” crap. Really? This exists? Apparently I’ve had my head in the clouds, but I didn’t realize this was a thing. Why would I follow someone just because they started following me?

 

I feel like this is just another example of why social media has created folks to be obsessed with themselves. Don’t get me wrong. I have clearly fallen into this trap from time to time. I mean if one of my Facebook photos doesn’t get 50 likes within 30 minutes, then clearly it was not worthy enough.

 

But really, I don’t follow anyone unless I’m interested in seeing the content they put out there and I would never expect someone I choose to follow to follow me back “just because.” If this is some kind of social media etiquette, then whoever invented this “rule” was probably some super, narcissistic crazy person who feeds off of numbers. Numbers are not the end all to why I write. I write because it’s my outlet. I write because I can. I write because I hope to encourage someone else. I write to blow off steam. I write for a good laugh. If you aren’t interested in what I have to say, then by all means, don’t follow me. I want the authentic. I want the curious. I want the genuine readers.

So what about the people who do follow you? I was talking to my friend about this and she mentioned people who start following someone, like a blogger or a “typical civilian” expect a return. If you’re Beyonce then it’s not expected for a follow back. Duh. But an “average Joe”? Their is an expectation they will be followed back. What will I do with people who follow me? I’ve started sending a “thank you” message. Saying, “I noticed you noticed me. You are awesome. Thank you!” And if I’m interested in their profile and what they have out for everyone to see, I will follow back. If they put out content that is about knitting underwear for their family for Christmas, then I might not be interested. I don’t think I would ever have the patience to knit, let alone knit underwear. There’s nothing wrong with knitting underwear. I’m just not interested in that topic and it doesn’t seem like a topic I would branch out on either. Nothing personal, people. Sheesh.

Do you follow people back if they follow you? Do you agree or disagree? Why?

Do you follow backPIN

 

 

 

 

Get Your Body Back after Baby

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I met Erin in a mom’s group on Facebook. I asked the group a question about Asher and she responded with some kind advice. Once someone comments on your question, you start to notice them more as they comment on other posts. I paid attention to Erin and her “social media etiquette” and found her to be a lovely person. Not long after my question, Erin reached out to me via a private message and we found we were both teachers! We became friends on Facebook and I soon learned that she is a fitness lay-day! She works hard and is AWESOME at encouraging others–a dominate trait I see in Erin. She is such an encourager and positive person.  I knew I wanted to have her on the blog to encourage other moms to improve their health. Enough rambling from me! I’ll let Erin take the stage!

Erin

 

I’m nervous what’s going to happen to my body after having this baby. Will I ever get my body back? Will I be able to wear my pre-pregnancy jeans? Will I turn into a “frumpy” mom? Will I have “mom” gut forever? Will I feel sexy again? Will I still feel comfortable in a bikini?
Ever have these thoughts? I did. As a first time mom, there are so many new things dealing with the baby that I think we struggle with these inner thoughts, but then as soon as we start to try to figure it out, the baby wakes up, needs to eat, needs a diaper change, etc. And the cycle continues.
However I’m here to HIGHLY encourage you not to wait to long. There will ALWAYS be something to do. Whether with the baby, the house, your job, your husband, etc. But MAKING time to take care of you WILL make you a better wife, mom, more patient, you’ll have more energy, you’ll feel more confident about yourself, plus you’ll be teaching your kids BY EXAMPLE how to take care of themselves!
Not only that, I’m here to tell you that you CAN DO IT! You can get your body back, or better! You can wear your pre-pregnancy jeans, you don’t have to be a ‘frumpy’ mom, you can get rid of your mom gut, feel sexy again and wear a bikini proudly!
Think I’m crazy? Well it happened to me! And if I can do it, so can you! After having 3 kids, I’m actually in the BEST SHAPE of my life! I have toned arms and legs, no ‘frumpy’ flat mom butt, I’m wearing clothes 3 sizes SMALLER than I ever did before I was pregnant, I have a flat stomach (though get me in a plank and I still have some saggy skin), I feel confident in my clothes, feel good about myself and I learned how to take care of myself physically and how to eat properly.
Here’s my transformation video http://youtu.be/4fyiseQrMjs (This one I did after baby #2, but I did the same process and got the same results after baby #3).
So how do you do this too?
1. Your baby is not an excuse, your baby is your REASON for taking care of yourself. Stop the excuse that you don’t have time. You have the same 24 hours that other moms have that are in your similar shoes and they make time to workout. I’m not saying it’s going to be convenient, but you do have time.
Most practical (notice I didn’t say convenient times to workout): In the morning before your kids wake up During nap time Doing it WITH them! Doing 30 min of exercise and have them play in the room. After your kids go to bed (I know you’re tired. Do it anyway.)
2. You HAVE to have a plan! I was actually a fitness instructor and a personal trainer before having kids. And I NEVER got the results I was after UNTIL I followed a workout program and a nutrition plan! That’s because they’re smarter than I am and put together a fool proof plan to get you LASTING results! If you follow the workout calendar, IT WILL WORK. If you replace one meal a day with Shakeology, IT WILL WORK. If you commit to sticking to the meal plan, IT WILL WORK. If you check in with our accountability group every single day, learning and growing together, IT WILL WORK.
3. That leads me into the last thing you’ll need. ACCOUNTABILITY. You can do it on your own, but you’re MORE LIKELY to succeed if you have someone to do it with you! And that’s me!! I won’t let you down or let you give up on yourself!
I run accountability groups monthly to help you find the right program for you, guide you with your nutrition, plug you into an accountability group to keep you on track! Check out some success stories by clicking here. 
If this is something you’re looking for, or just want some advise on where to start your fitness journey, I want to help you!!
Fill out this form so I can learn more about you and your specific needs.
Send me a friend request on Facebook, and let’s connect there too!
YOU GOT THIS!
BodyBackGuestPost

Which Wonder Week Was the Worst for You?

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WHICH WONDER WEEK WAS THE WORST FOR YOU?
I have googled my butt off and I could not find a clear cut poll with other opinions about which Wonder Weeks others found to be the most difficult for their little one. As a result, I have created my own for us!

(This post contains some affiliate links which means if you click through a link then I may receive a small commission to keep up my writing addiction:) Thanks mama!)

There are countless times when Bubby just isn’t acting right. I go through and think, Is he teething? Is he sick? Diaper rash? and the list goes on. But sometimes, I can’t seem to find anything wrong and then I realize that he is in a Wonder Week.

I think like most moms, I find myself googling “which wonder week is the worst” because there is encouragement in numbers. Knowing that someone else feels what you’re feeling can make a parent feel less crazy. Just click below which WW you found to be the most challenging.

By the way, did you know that there is an app for Wonder Weeks?!?! Whaaaaaa? Yep. I have the book, but having the app is like keeping tiny snippets to remind me I’m not insane right in my pocket. Check it out.

By all means, please tell us how you survived in the comments below.
Cheers!
Glo


 

 

Wonder Weeks

Snuggly Morning Nursing

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Some of my favorite moments are nursing Asher. I love the sleepy eyes and grabby hands as he voraciously eats in the morning. I’ve gotten into this habit of asking other parents when is their favorite time to feed their little one. Some dads love the bedtime bottle, giving them time alone after a busy day. Some moms like the morning bottle to start their day off in peace before heading to work. Other moms like the afternoon nursing to bring some quiet to their chaotic day.

No matter how or when you feed your little, I have found almost all parents have a bonding experience during that time. I’ve talk before about how feeding a baby can be lonely, especially during those early months, but I’m learning as time goes on, I’m really starting to cherish some of these quiet moments Asher and I have together.

I love my snuggly morning nursing.

What about you? When is or was your favorite time to feed your squish?

5 Freezable Baby-led Weaning Breakfasts

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FIVE FREEZABLE BREAKFAST FOODS FOR BABY-LED WEANING

I’ve got a new list for us! You know how I am about lists… Once Bubby started eating foods with his hands along with pureed foods, I really became interested in making healthy foods for him and for me! I love that about baby-led weaning: Feed them what you’re eating! While starting this journey, I was reminded of what I already knew. Foods we eat are full of sodium and sugar, which are items you need to be wary of when feeding baby what you eat. I try not to obsess about this but I like to be aware.  I found that breakfast foods where an easy first start for us when giving him food to handle on his own.

Breakfast foods are easy to make, can be made in bulk for freezing and eating later, and can be made a little more versatile with adding different ingredients here or there. While these breakfast ideas are probably not ground breaking, the recipe ingredients might be new to you and the taste is soooo worth trying!

Don’t underestimate the power of freezing foods. As I started feeding Bubby what we’re eating, I quickly realized he didn’t eat all that much and I didn’t want it to go to waste, especially if he loved the food, so I started freezing different foods to see how they would turn out!

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Whole Wheat Waffles Strips

These waffles are delicious! I took the original recipe from Lisa at 100daysofrealfood.com.  The only thing I do different from her is a I add 1 1/2 tsp of vanilla and I double the recipe so I can have a big batch to freeze later! Doubling her recipe gave me 22 waffles. Husband and I ate four for breakfast, Bubby ate some of one, so I froze 17 waffles. These recipes use naturally sweet ingredients instead of sugar. Bonus! Anytime she adds salt, I just omit it. 🙂 #babyledweaningwin

*EXTRA MOM HACKS*

*Spreading yogurt on these is really yummy. Have you ever tried whole milk, plain yogurt. I swear it tastes almost like cream cheese. Bubby loves it! Another nice thing about spreading yogurt on these is you’ve now created a sticky layer to add some other food! I squish raspberries, blueberries, pears, blackberries and bananas on these waffles! You could even sprinkle a little smidge of cinnamon to add a little flavor flair!

*To freeze these, I just put them in a freezer Ziploc bag. When we want to eat them, I put them in the toaster and they’re ready in like two minutes!

*Take a Saturday morning to make a double or triple batch of these. It’s worth it!!

 

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EGGS Galore

Don’t forget the power of eggs! I should add that it is totally up to you on when you introduce eggs. Apparently, there’s a lot of new research out there that says it’s OK to feed your baby eggs around 6-8 months. Like anything, Google it and ask your pediatrician because I’m just a mom telling you my experience over a cup of coffe.

Husband and I don’t have any food allergies and neither do our families. The rule of thumb is if it’s an allergy somewhere in your family, then you’ll probably want to wait. With that, Bubby LOVES scrambled eggs. Again, this is another food when you can add variety AND you can freeze cooked eggs and they warm up pretty nicely.

*EXTRA MOM HACKS*

*When making your scrambled eggs, add a little milk. This makes them fluffier and juicier so baby can grab chunks easily.

*Try Egg Muffins! Once I discovered this, I have gone to town with all sorts of varieties. You can add bacon and bread chunks to a muffin cup, pour in your egg mixture, pop them in the oven, and freeze the leftovers! Super easy! Peppers, cheeses, spinach, and other greens are easy add-ins to your egg muffin cups and gives baby a variety to try!

*My rule of thumb when I try something new in the oven is to start at 350 degrees for baking. This seems to be a pretty universal temperature. You can figure out about how many eggs you’ll need to fill 12-24 cups to your liking. I have found that 8-10 eggs (depending on egg size) works well to make 12 full muffin cups. If you have extra, just make a small batch of scrambled eggs to eat on the spot with your little one!

*Another incident where silicone is awesome. I love my silicone muffin cups! Seriously, 24 reusable cups for $10 bucks is UH-mazing. Awesome for freezing and non-sticking. Plus, whenever I decide to use my muffin pans, I never have to worry if I have muffin cups on hand! When you freeze the eggs, I would freeze them in a single layer first, then throw them in a bag. I think the cooked eggs like to stick to each other.

*These warm up nicely in the microwave!


 

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MUFFINS!!!

While we’re on the topic of muffins, another favorite around here are these awesome berry, nut, banana, whatever you want muffins! I totally stole this recipe from Lisa and we LOVE THEM! I leave the salt out of these too. They are super easy. Seriously. I made them in like 15 minutes, total. I honestly don’t worry about exact measurements of fruit that I add to these. I just add whatever I have on hand. I like to buy berries to eat throughout the weak. When I can see they are trying to go bad before they get eaten all up, I like to make this recipe to use the berries all up!

*EXTRA MOM HACKS*

*My picture above only has blueberries, but I’ve made these with blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, strawberries and bananas before. They turn out lovely! You could even add chocolate chips if you want something with a little sugar! 😉

*In Lisa’s recipe, she uses coconut oil. I use canola oil and have never noticed a taste problem.

*To defrost, you could put them in your fridge over night or even just on the counter. I have done both and they seem fine. Honestly though, I find I don’t think to eat these until the morning of, so I just zap them in the microwave for a minute or so and they turn out great!

 

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FRENCH TOAST STICKS

My favorite about french toast is that I love it so much it started me on making my own bread.
(Quick Digression: We got a bread machine for Christmas some time ago and I put that baby to work every week! If you have one, I really encourage you to bust it out! There are some great, easy recipes out there!)
OK, back to freezing food! This breakfast might be an exception to your salt intake if you buy commercial bread. Nothing wrong at all with doing this! I would probably consider this your splurge meal of the day for baby if that’s the case.

*EXTRA MOM HACKS*

*French toast seasoning is really about your preference. Personally, I whisk together a few eggs, a little milk, cinnamon, nutmeg, and a hint of vanilla and a drop orange juice in mine.

*To freeze these, make sure you don’t have too soggy of bread when you’re done. I have found freezing these when soggy, creates a mushy after freeze. I put these in the toaster when I take them out of the freezer and they have the perfect little crunch to them!

*I have found Bubby likes any bread-related item, like his mamma 🙂 Don’t be afraid to try different varieties of toast! Sometimes I give him toast with his scrambled eggs. Sometimes I give him toast with yogurt spread on it and fruit, etc.

 

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YOGURT  CUBED SMOOTHIE

If you love smoothies and want an easy way to have some on hand for those urges and want baby to share in the yumminess with you, this is the easiest way to have a smoothie on the go!

*EXTRA MOM HACKS*

*When you are done making your smoothie, freeze a batch in ice cube trays so you can control how many you want to grab later. We all know smoothies can have incredible varieties for taste! I use whole milk yogurt and a tad of OJ. I try to do more yogurt than OJ to limit some of the sugar and to help with consistency. This has worked well for me!

*When you want some immediately for eating, put it in the microwave on the medium heating setting for 20 second increments. Once it starts to get a hint of mushy, break it up with your spoon to mix with the cold on the inside and enjoy!

*If you know you’ll want it for lunch for yourself and baby, then take out a batch and put it in the fridge. It will be ready to eat by lunch! I like to store batches for myself in my small pyrex containers.

 

Do you have any favorite recipes you love to share with  your little one? Any favs to add to the list?

5 FreezablePIN

Supper Sundays: Spinach Gnocchi

I was really excited about this recipe! I love anything Italian!! Gnocchi is an Italian dish and I was excited for Lisa to post this recipe to her website.

For our dinner we had a big salad, the gnocchi and some of Lisa’s cheddar and garlic drop biscuits.
I love making a quadruple batch of her cheddar garlic biscuits and then freezing them. They are so easy to get out of the freezer real quick before dinner and warm them up in the microwave!

Spinach Gnocchi an Italian dish that everyone should try!

Here are Lisa’s ingredients (click here for her entire recipe):
1-10 ounce bag of frozen spinach (I used fresh spinach and eyeballed what I thought would be enough)
1 1/2 cup of ricotta cheese, whole milk. (I just bought the smallest container they had and used it all, so 10 oz)
3/4 cup of grated parmesan cheese
1 1/4 cup of whole wheat flour
1 egg
Salt and pepper to taste
Special tools needed: food processor

The steps are pretty easy: put it all in a food processor and go for it! BUT if you don’t have a food processor…
I tried this with just handheld beaters to see how it would play out for our readers who don’t have one. I went for a long time without a food processor (although now that we have one, I LOVE IT!).

If you know how to use your beaters, you can figure out ways to handle big batches of ingredients that require using a good amount of flour. Now, since I “eyeballed” my spinach, and was not exact in my measurements of ricotta cheese, mine may have turned out doughier than how hers turned out.

I found that I ended up using almost 2 whole cups of flour, instead of the 1 1/4 cups to get the goop to not stick to my fingers anymore so I could handle it to make the shapes needed to cook the stuff. I was afraid adding more flour would hinder the taste, so I kept tasting it throughout and found that it everything seemed to be in good order.

Once you get it all mixed to a non-sticky texture, you want to make it into a log so you can cut it up into cubes to drop in a boiling pan of water.
This is where a silicone mat would come in reeeeal handy so your “dough” doesn’t stick to everything. If you don’t have any, you’ll definitely want to use a floured surface. In fact, if you find your mixture is still “sticky” to the touch, you might try putting it on your floured surface and add more that way.

(The more I started making this recipe, the more I just started using two spoons to scoop out “blobs” to drop into the boiling water. Works like a charm for me 🙂 )

My logs weren’t very pretty 🙂 Neither is this picture….
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As you can see, I got about 25 dough balls from my logs. If you have a family of four, I would guess this would last you for the one meal. I wouldn’t expect leftovers. We are big leftover people. I like having them for lunch in the week.

Next you’ll want to drop them into a big pan of boiling water. Once they all start floating towards the top, you know they are done.

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So what do you serve with your gnocchi? Whatever you want! I believe it’s popular to serve it with a tomato-based sauce. I had a pan of sauce warming on the stove while they were boiling. I also warmed up the garlic drops and put our salad together. What I love about recipes like this is that Bubby can join in. He loved the gnocchi!

 

Have you ever made gnocchi before? Any other Italian dishes you think we should try? I am always looking for wholesome cooking suggestions!

Cheers!

Enjoy the Little Things: Bubby’s Almost 8 Months!

 

 

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He laughs pretty much every time I toot.

We’re almost 8 months old. Yikes.

He laughs when he drops things. Repeatedly. On purpose.

Splashing is a good thing in the tub.

Naps are craptastic right now.

I never knew someone could be so impatient when eating peas.

Clinginess comes in spurts. Sometimes it’s like a tidal wave.bubbyshands

I want to just eat up his hands. So sweet.

I wish the top teeth would just come in already.

He’s a pro at grabbing his food these days. Except for those peas.

The boy has never chewed on anything except his hands. Ladies and gentleman, I give you the mystery of the wooden spoon. Chew toy #1 in our house.

Usborne touchy feely books, you are awesome.

Clinginess equals extra snuggles before nap time. Thank you.

 

To read more detailed summaries for Asher, click here.

I Am Not my Husband’s Holy Spirit

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I’ve been wanting to write about this for a while now. I know some friends of mine who would love to change things about their husbands. Don’t get me wrong. We love them and there are so many things we wouldn’t ever want to change, but I know we can all relate to the things we wish were a little different. And I’m sure there are many husbands out there who would say the same thing about their wives. I have recently felt like God is speaking to me about this in my relationship with Mike and all I can say is the message I’ve been getting loud and clear is that I am not my husband’s holy spirit. 

I have found in many of my conversations with my friends and with myself, things that we want to change about our husbands sometimes fall into the “spiritual” category. Apparently, we think we know what is best for him and his relationship with Christ. I could easily give a checklist about what my friends and myself think our husbands should be doing differently to better his relationship with Christ.

1) He should frequently initiate prayer with his wife. I mean if I’m having a bad day I want to pray about it. Right?
2) He should want to read the Bible with his wife. I LOVE to read. Why shouldn’t I expect this from him too?
3) He should take initiative to communicate about his spiritual journey with his wife. Let’s stay up and talk about this for hours. Ha!
4) He should read his Bible a lot, in front of me, so I can see it to make me feel better for some reason.
5) Being a leader in the church in some capacity would be a nice bonus.
6) Insert some other expectation in your mind that you think your husband should be doing.

Seriously, though, I sat down and wrote down all the things I thought Mike should “grow” in as a Christian dad/husband of our home. Whether you’ve actually written these down or not, I’m sure you’ve got that list somewhere in your heart. My list had some similarities to the one above. I then made a list of all the things that Mike already is as a Christian dad/husband of our home. As I followed this process I felt God revealing to me that my perception of what we think our husbands should be are based more on worldly expectations instead of what God’s Word says.

Our checklists are based on our emotional desires/needs than maybe what God has really in store for them. Mike does initiate prayer. Maybe not everytime I wish he did, but he certainly does in other various situations. Mike does read his Bible. Honestly, I’m not sure how often he does this. If I was only around him every second of the day… God said to me,”Gloryanna, you’re not his Holy Spirit. What makes you think he needs to “grow” in all these things? How are you growing? What are you learning?” It was then that I knew God was re-directing my focus on to Him and my relationship with Him and where I’m at in my journey with Him.

I was reminded of John Eldredge’s book Love and War when he talks about how mysterious marriage is, yet it is so obvious that God created the union between a man and a woman to reflect His relationship with us. As a result, our marriages are an element to cause us to grow in our relationship with Christ. What is beautiful about this is that in the way I view Mike as “weak” or needs to grow, I find that I’m relatively strong at. I’m sure many of you have learned this in your marriage that you both tend to have complimenting strengths and weaknesses. Where I’m weak, he’s strong. Where he’s weak, I’m strong.

I had never really thought before about how my strengths could be used to help encourage Mike and influence him in a positive way. For example, when I wake in the mornings, I have found that I like to pray before my feet hit the ground. Starting the day off choosing joy and God’s peace is vital to my daily walk. Instead of being discouraged that Mike isn’t all bright-eyed and bushy-taled to start the day like that with me, doesn’t mean I can’t initiate that for BOTH of us as we start our day.

As a result, on Mondays and Wednesdays, I roll over and whisper to Mike that I’m going to pray for our day. Come to find out, he loves that I do this and it means a lot for him to start his day this way. Simple example of something that I could have easily been irritated with and gone about all the wrong way. I find many of us might say something to our husbands like, “you know, it would be really nice if we prayed more together. Why don’t we take turns praying before we get out of bed?” or maybe something like “I wish you would pray in the mornings with me. It would make you feel so much better.”

I don’t know about your husbands, but Mike can hardly function in the mornings, let alone in bed at 6:00AM in the dark. I realized this is a strength for me and it comes naturally to get up and get going in the mornings. Why shouldn’t I do this for Mike? It has brought him a lot of encouragement on his stressful days to have that quick few minutes with me and the Lord in the morning to start his day off.

It’s funny when you start to look at how you and your spouse compliment each other. Here I’ve gone on about praying to start the day off, but many times, in the heat of a trial or challenge, I can easily start to rely on my own reasoning to try and solve the problem. I’m such a “go-getter” that this can get the best of me at times. There have been times I would get frustrated because I felt Mike wasn’t being active in helping the situation, only to find that he’s taking his time, meditating and praying about it. He is quick to remind me to chill out and pray and breathe for a second. A great character trait that didn’t show up on my expectations list. I mean if he doesn’t read his Bible at the start of every day that’s a problem, but lets overlook how he acts when we’re faced with a challenge.

I’m so quick to forget and become clouded with my own list. God loves us unconditionally and doesn’t put legalistic expectations on us in our relationship with him. Why am I doing that to my husband? Well, I know Satan gets a lot of satisfaction from this. Another great thing about Eldredge’s book Love and War. He reminds us that we are at war in our marriages. Satan wants nothing more than to bring bitterness, discontent, anger, etc., into our marriages. We forget we are on the same team.

We can so easily lose sight of the big picture and what God is doing in our relationship with our spouse. Some of our husbands really may need to grow in some of the areas on our list but in the end, they have free will and choices, just like us. We are not their Holy Spirit. We are their helpmates. So what does this mean? As Mike’s helpmate and wife, I want to be as encouraging to him as possible in his relationship with Christ. I’ve got a good hunch that any rude remarks or “guilting” conversations are certainly not going to encourage him. Why is it that many of us feel that if we just tell them what their doing wrong, it’s a good idea? The more I think about that, the dumber it sounds. I have NEVER responded well to someone “guilting” me or condemning me. If anything, I pull away from that person. I am immediately reminded of 1 Peter 3:1-5

The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance–they styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes–but your inner disposition.

To me, this is a huge reminder of how actions speak louder than words. To me this says, you are your husband’s helpmate. The way you live will encourage him.  Of course this doesn’t mean that anything we say just floats off, pointless. We all know communication is important. And let’s face it, we are definitely going to screw this up daily. That’s the beauty of surrendering to Christ and managing that surrender daily. Letting Christ grow in us and taking the focus off of what our husbands aren’t doing, focus on what they are doing, and really focus on what God is doing in us, will bring us peace. Let God take care of the rest. Trust can be a marvelous experience when we truly release ourselves to it.

You know what’s interesting, before those verses about wives, if you notice Peter says “The same goes for you wives.” Well, Peter just got done talking about the kind of life Christ lived while he was on earth. Yah, he talks about how he was crucified and suffered in silence, content to let God set things right. I know these verses can touch our hearts in a lot of different ways, but I don’t think we can overlook the fact that Peter wrote these verse hand in hand. If anything, it reminds me that God will set things right. God does care about every detail of our lives. Focusing on that brings me peace about what the future and present hold for my marriage. I certainly don’t get those feelings when I get all wrapped up in what I think my husband should be doing.

I would encourage you take a few moments and make a list of all the positive, godly character traits your husband has. Keep that list some place you know you’ll read it often. Maybe at the bottom write “I am not my husband’s Holy Spirit, but I am his helpmate.”

Evaluate your strengths as his wife and helpmate. Think about ways your strengths could bring encouragement to him. What actions could you do? Ask God to show you ways you can bring encouragement to your husband, instead of resorting to a “guilting conversation.”

Evaluate his strengths as your husband and helpmate. What areas have you overlooked or forgotten about because you were focused on your expectations instead of what he is already strong at?

Give yourself a brief moment, as much as possible (I try to do this daily) when you can pray and speak positive over your husband and your marriage. I love The Secret Power of Speaking God’s Word by Joyce Meyer. She has a whole section with bible verses for wives to confess out loud about their husband, marriage, and themselves. I have these posted in various places in my house, along with other verses about being a mom and prayers for your children. There is huge value and effect in writing God’s word down and posting it around you to read. Habakkuk 2:2 says

Then the Lord replied, “write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that anyone can read it easily.”

Whatever you do, don’t stop praying. Whatever you do, forgive yourself and your husband for anything that is keeping you from experiencing the joy God wants you to have in your marriage. Marriage is hard. We know forgiveness can seem even harder sometimes. Remember, you and your husband are on the same team. Think about how much energy we waste being angry or wishing for things to change. How much joy are you letting Satan rob from you? Take back your joy. Choose happiness. Choose encouragement. Choose to be the wonderful helpmate God picked long before the earth was created for your husband. Accept that you are going to fail at this at times and as you accept the flaws in yourself, accept the flaws in your husband. Embrace the redemption Christ brings to us.

 

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